


Flower In the Moonlight

by Maggiemaye



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M, Fluff, POV Remus Lupin, Pining, Romance, ish, pre-OotP
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-20
Updated: 2018-02-20
Packaged: 2019-03-21 15:27:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,453
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13743837
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Maggiemaye/pseuds/Maggiemaye
Summary: But she was looking up at him; he could see the soft outline of her smile and Remus knew, more than ever, that he’d tipped over the invisible edge that had beckoned him since the day they had met.





	Flower In the Moonlight

**Author's Note:**

> I should definitely be in bed, but I had to get this posted and out of my system. This is my first attempt at Remadora, so any feedback would be much appreciated. It takes place somewhere between "impressed" and "seriously smitten." The title is part of a line from "If I Keep My Heart Out Of Sight" by James Taylor, who I imagine Remus would have loved. And I thought it was just the kind of romantic line that pining!Remus would have come up with while waxing poetic about Tonks :)

Grimmauld was dark and quiet when Remus returned from his guard duty. A part of him was relieved not to see Sirius still awake and drinking—maybe he’d gone to bed at a decent hour for once—but he couldn’t deny that he preferred the house when it was active. The place was dreary enough as it was, without the nighttime pressing down. And these days, Remus often found himself looking for a little more color than he otherwise might.

He waited in the doorway for his eyes to adjust, in order to avoid the stubbed toe that so often befell Tonks when she tangled with the umbrella stand. An amused huff escaped his nose as he recalled her most recent skirmish at the door. She’d ended up flat on her back, cursing, and Remus had pulled her up by the hand.

Then, as if her name in his mind had directed his gaze, he noticed that her boots were still flung next to the dreaded troll leg. Had Tonks not gone home?

His question was answered by the person-sized lump on the sofa. He held his lighted wand-tip close enough to see Tonks’s sleeping form, covered up to her ears by a thick blanket. Her hair was sunset orange, mostly, with a deep brown spreading slowly outward from the roots. Idly, he wondered if it was her natural color, if she even had a natural color, and what other fascinating things her hair might do as she slept.

There was also a purring noise coming from the sofa. Upon closer inspection he saw Crookshanks curled tight in the space behind Tonks’s knees. He smiled down at the pair of them for a few moments, watching her fingers twitch next to her face, before deciding that he couldn’t let her spend the whole night on the ancient and most lumpy couch of Black. Still, it was nice to see her at rest for once. Remus was used to struggling to keep up with her, before inevitably giving it up as a waste of effort. No one matched Nymphadora Tonks for energy, or enthusiasm, or a host of other wonderful things that Remus drank in like water when she was around.

An unseen force seemed to still his hand before he could reach for her. _Just a little longer,_ something inside him seemed to say. _Don’t break the spell yet._

Odd.

“Tonks,” he murmured, shaking the voice away and nudging her shoulder. “Wake up.”

She groaned a bit, swimming to the surface of dreams with some effort. Then all at once she gasped and sat halfway up, looking disoriented as she worked out who he was.

“Remus?” she said, blinking. “How did it go?”

He gestured down at himself, hoping to indicate that he was all in one piece. It was a moment before he trusted himself to speak; he had never heard her voice quite so raspy before.

“You should have gone to bed,” he said finally, wondering if he sounded stern. He didn’t mean to. It was just so easy to give her instructions sometimes. She was so new, after all, and so young. Although the solemn expression she was currently fixing on him felt anything but immature. The room was not quite pitch dark; there was enough light from his wand-tip for him to see her dark eyes glittering.

Remus felt a flush creep up the back of his neck. He tried not to think about it.

Tonks sighed, clambering up to an upright position. “I wanted to wait up for you, but clearly that didn’t work out. Sirius was down here with me, but…” She lifts the blanket with a confused look. “He must have gone upstairs. Are you sure you’re alright?”

“Of course.” Remus was confused. “You know I was just at Privet Drive, don’t you? Just hiding in some shrubbery and watching the house.”

“I know,” she hastened to say, “but I just worry, you know? Anything can happen at any time. Just a couple weeks ago a suspect got the drop on my coworker and he wasn’t expecting it at all. He made out okay but it was still a scare.” She stopped talking abruptly, as she sometimes did after she’d got going. Remus wished she wouldn’t. He was so used to weighing and measuring his words so carefully; hearing hers tumble together was refreshing. Authentic. It was just _nice,_ in a way he hadn’t permitted himself to examine just yet.

“You must think I’m such a kid, worrying like this over something so stupid.” Her voice was a whisper in the night, shaking Remus out of thoughts he had no business thinking anyway. She drew her legs up to drape her arms over them, resting her chin on her knees and staring pointedly ahead.

“I think Mad-Eye would be proud to know you’re so constantly vigilant,” said Remus with what he hoped was a reassuring smile. Tonks smiled back, briefly.

“It’s bad enough to be the only new Auror recruit. I’m the youngest here too.” Her voice had gotten small. “Sometimes I sit in meetings and look around at everyone, and I imagine that you’re all wondering what I’m doing there.”

Remus wondered what had brought this on. He had never seen Tonks show even a hint of insecurity; none that he’d been able to detect, anyway. She appeared to walk through her life with ease. Remus had been envious of her obvious youth, something he’d never had. Being young wasn’t the same as experiencing _youth_ , the way most people did. The way all his friends had, before they’d been thrust into dark times. Even then, Remus had felt as though he was watching from the sidelines, older than he had any right to be.

Tonks, it seemed, was experiencing yet more pitfalls of youth that he couldn’t relate to - or, on further reflection, perhaps he could. He thought of her eagerness to include herself in anything she could, to show her skills, to prove her worth.

Even under the cover of darkness, he could tell she wasn’t looking at him. Perhaps it was the safety of not being seen that had drawn her out tonight. Remus wondered, though, why she would choose him to confide in.

“Anyway,” Tonks concluded. “Sorry to unload on you, I just…”

“I do sometimes forget what it’s like to experience all of this for the first time,” he said softly to the ceiling; he didn’t want to embarrass Tonks with something as direct as eye contact. “When I joined the Order years ago, it took a while to fully understand the magnitude of what we were doing. Let alone to build the skill it takes to actually be useful to such an operation. I felt I was flying blind for quite a long time.”

Out of the corner of his eye he saw Tonks turn her head towards him.

“But now we have you. Specially trained to make Dark wizards beg for mercy. You’re one of the most uniquely qualified members the Order has ever had. Now all you need is experience.”

“Do you promise?” she asked him playfully, but she couldn’t quite conceal the earnestness of the question.

“I promise. You’re extraordinary,” he told her, trying not to sound too desperately tender. She pressed her shoulder to his arm, and Remus decided that darkness was a dangerous thing. It made him far more susceptible to the rich husk of her voice, and the warmth of her against his side.

It was absurd, of course. They were professionals. Colleagues. Partners.

While he was reciting these words to himself, she shifted to lean more fully on his shoulder. He froze, took a stuttering breath, and tried to will himself to move away from her. It was best, he told himself. But she was looking up at him; he could see the soft outline of her smile and Remus knew, more than ever, that he’d tipped over the invisible edge that had beckoned him since the day they had met.

“You’re pretty extraordinary yourself,” said Tonks in a low voice, her chin a breath away from his shoulder.

“You stole my adjective.”

“Don’t worry. I’ll come up with a better one.” She turned away again, but Remus could see her grin in his mind’s eye anyway.

“I look forward to it,” he replied, his voice so gently teasing that he hardly recognized it. Another effect of the darkness, perhaps. Remus settled back against the sofa, letting his mind drift around the edges of fantasies. Dreaming, for him, was never without its share of pain. But as Tonks’s breath deepened, he imagined that he could let the ever-present foreboding disappear into the night.


End file.
